Fortune Cookies for Writers

A few weeks ago, I was shamed by a fortune cookie. I opened it up to find a fortune that implied I needed more exercise. Ever since that incident, I have opened my fortune cookies with trepidation.

Then, I started to think. What if there were shaming fortune cookies for writers? What if they voiced all the things we tell ourselves when the writing isn't going so well?

I think they might say things like this:

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I don't need a fortune cookie for that last one. Zeca has told me that twice in recent months.