We Are in This Together


Recently, Luisa was out of town for work and I was preoccupied with everything that had to be done that evening. I needed to supervise homework and reading and make sure the kids took showers and then needed to find time to do my own work. But before I could get to all that, I had to get dinner on the table and then do the dishes.

I was stressed out and feeling impatient with my kids who seemed to be floating through the house without a care in the world and at that very moment, both kids drifted into my path and I said, “You did more to help around the house when you were toddlers.”

It was a fact.

The Unexpected


Bite that lip, girl… (Me, back in the day)

Several weeks ago, my friend Nancy of Midlife Mixtape asked me to write a post for “Still in Rotation,” a series in which writers talk about albums from their past that they still listen to today, and one album came to mind immediately, “Steady On” by Shawn Colvin.

My story went up on her blog today and here’s an excerpt:

My friend had a friend in from out of town and, after we finished playing a song, my friend leaned in and kissed her visitor, and I tensed, a physical reaction that came with no accompanying thought. I sat staring at them for a moment and then packed up my guitar and music, made an excuse and bolted.

In the story, I mention a friend and her girlfriend, my first girlfriend and Luisa and it is striking that the post went live today when I spent last night having drinks with those very women. The two unnamed lovers in my coming out story are still together today and remain two of my closest friends, so close in fact that we got married with them last October. My first girlfriend is a nearly daily part of my life as well, part of my chosen family. And Luisa, well, she’s stuck with me for nearly 21 years. If you’d asked me 24 years ago what my life would look like, if I thought the players in my coming out story would still be part of almost all of my stories today, I would have never imagined it would turn out that way. But here we are – the connections shifting and growing stronger over the years.

Life is full of the unexpected. You see two people kiss and your life changes forever. You find friendship in the ruins of a romantic relationship. You meet a young woman at a concert and end up building a life together. Doesn’t it make you wonder what is happening now that you might someday look back on and think, “That’s when everything changed…”

Head over to Nancy’s and read the full post.

The Mighty Mississip


Hello there readers of this blog. My, you look lovely today. The fall colors really bring out your eyes and your ears look adorable and not at all elfin which is what we all want to avoid with ears. Not that I have a problem with elves – some of my favorite fictional characters are elves. In fact, I have Snow Miser’s hair right now – like a white, icy helmet on my head. Though, now that I think about it, Snow Miser isn’t an elf. He is something else. What is he exactly? Well, now is not the time to dwell on such mysteries. We’ll save that for December.

By now you have realized that this is one of those posts…you know the kind…the rambling post that has no point. I hope you love that kind! You probably don’t, though. Luisa hates posts like this – she probably won’t even finish reading it and definitely won’t log into my blog and fix my typos like she usually does. But, I figure it’s better to ramble than remain silent. I think that’s in the constitution or something.

So, what have I been up to? I’m sure you don’t care but I’m going to tell you anyway. That’s why I started a blog in 2006 – to write whatever I want! Power to the people.

Keep Walking


We got Chinese takeout last week. We rarely eat the fortune cookies so they lay about until I finally remember that the world will not end if I throw away an unopened fortune cookie, that there is no Good Will drop off site for uneaten fortune cookies. A couple of days after takeout night, I was standing in the kitchen, leaning against the wall sipping a cup of coffee and I noticed the three fortune cookies and I looked at them, concentrating to see which one called out to me. One finally did and I opened it up, cast the cookie aside and read the fortune.