Twenty Years

photovlWhen we met, I was only 24 and she was only 23. We were both new to Minneapolis and each lost in our own ways.

We were so different.

I was from Kansas and she was from Portugal. She spoke impeccable English but didn’t get any of my pop culture references. I was words and stories and loud laughter and she was quiet and analytical and had the most adorable smirk.

We were a little bit of a mess at times. We were so young.

Twenty years have passed and we are different versions of ourselves, better versions.

I know, without a doubt, that I am a better person because of her.

It sounds sentimental and it is but it is also a truth born of work. We are not perfect, individually or together. There is no secret or special magic. We’ve made it this far simply by wanting the best for each other, by honoring the most vulnerable parts of each other, by stripping away illusions.

I will always be the girl who is more likely to write her a poem than make her a pot of coffee and she will always be the girl who makes the pot of coffee rather than writing me a poem.

Somehow, it works.

I hope it keeps working for years to come.


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65 Responses to Twenty Years
  1. Ethan
    April 17, 2013 | 9:51 am

    I am chopping so many onions right meow.

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 9:55 am


  2. Lindsey
    April 17, 2013 | 9:52 am

    Congrats on 20 years! You are both so cute- I’m especially dead for the 90s look up top.

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 9:56 am

      We were just babies! Little babies of the 90’s!

  3. Kristina
    April 17, 2013 | 9:55 am

    Oh, love. You two are just the best. xoxo

  4. Ann Freeman
    April 17, 2013 | 9:57 am

    Beautiful! Yes to appreciating who each other actually is! Congrats.

  5. Blythe
    April 17, 2013 | 10:04 am

    Oh my gosh. So wonderful. My partner and I are 8 years in and I know that in 12 more we will be just as cute as you two!

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 10:27 am

      I don’t know…we are pretty cute :)

  6. Laura
    April 17, 2013 | 10:14 am

    i love you two. i know i’ve never met luisa, but still.

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 10:27 am


  7. Blazer
    April 17, 2013 | 10:16 am

    Can’t blame it on onions this time. I think Luisa owes you a pot of coffee after this one.

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 10:28 am

      She makes me coffee EVERY morning.

  8. Kristin
    April 17, 2013 | 10:20 am

    Love you both so very very much. I am so glad for the day you walked into that god forsaken job. Cheers to another 20 years.

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 10:28 am

      Love to you too! Do you ever feel guilty that you were betting that I wouldn’t last at the job?

  9. Liz @ PeaceLoveGuac
    April 17, 2013 | 10:21 am

    Y’all are adorable. Congratulations!

  10. Pam
    April 17, 2013 | 10:23 am

    This was just so sweet!!! Congrats on 20 years.

  11. Laurie
    April 17, 2013 | 10:24 am

    You are the cutest people and that top picture, GAH SO CUTE.

    I’m so glad you found each other. What a lucky, beautiful thing.

  12. Shannon
    April 17, 2013 | 10:27 am

    A whole-hearted congratulations to the both of you! Here’s to another twenty years (raises pot of coffee to you)

  13. Bee Girl
    April 17, 2013 | 10:29 am

    Congratulations on 20 years! So sweet, so profound, so beautiful. Cheers!

  14. TW
    April 17, 2013 | 10:31 am

    Happy anniversary! 20 years lovely!

  15. Molly
    April 17, 2013 | 10:32 am

    Happy 20 years!

  16. Evelyn
    April 17, 2013 | 10:49 am

    “Twenty years have passed and we are different versions of ourselves, better versions.”

    This is magic to sustainable relationships. Knowing you will be different, and grow. When you allow each other to grow even when you are stagnant and are not, the other grows and waits for you to catch up.

    This was the success for me and mine. Don’t stop growing. Don’t stop becoming a better version of yourselves.

  17. Katherine
    April 17, 2013 | 10:53 am

    Congratulations on 20 years! I am so lucky to have such an adorable, loving couple in my family.

  18. Mir
    April 17, 2013 | 10:56 am

    Happy, happy anniversary! I got a little teary. Also, please submit the current pic to go along with the definition of #mystique, because if it lasts 20+ years, I believe that’s it. <3

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 7:56 pm

      See? So mystiquey.

  19. Stacy
    April 17, 2013 | 10:59 am

    Mazel Tov 😉 I hope that someday I can reflect on 20 years too. :) This was beautiful. :)

  20. Julia Roberts
    April 17, 2013 | 11:03 am

    Oh, how I love those pictues! Love them!

    Congrats on 20 years! “Somehow it works.” <<< we say that a lot! Here's to 20 more years of bliss (and poems and coffee)!

  21. Momo Fali
    April 17, 2013 | 11:07 am

    Happy! Joy! Love! Here’s to much, much more of the same.

  22. Megan
    April 17, 2013 | 11:08 am

    Twenty years is awesome. Congratulations to you both and may you have fifty (at least) more years of love and happiness.

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 7:56 pm

      I don’t know about 50 more…

  23. Liz Olds
    April 17, 2013 | 11:28 am

    Vikki are ya goin’ soft on me??? So sweet – congrats on 20 years!

  24. Tricia O.
    April 17, 2013 | 11:35 am

    So very sweet. And the 90s picture just made my day.

  25. Alexandra
    April 17, 2013 | 11:43 am

    What the heck, damn something in my eye.


  26. Arnebya
    April 17, 2013 | 12:27 pm

    Definitely more years to come. Definitely.

  27. weese
    April 17, 2013 | 12:33 pm

    this is good.
    someone has to make the coffee.

    congrats kids.

  28. Louise
    April 17, 2013 | 12:43 pm

    SUCH cute pictures! You guys rock. xxxx

  29. Jasmine
    April 17, 2013 | 1:52 pm


    Just kidding. I knew that.
    What they didn’t tell me is how much I’d cry reading this damn lovely dovey blog!

    Luisa is SO awesome! Please tell her I am sorry for all the times I tried to become your mistress in not so subtle ways. Orrr… just don’t tell her at all. I am happy you have each other!

    Happy Anniversary!

  30. Lyz
    April 17, 2013 | 2:21 pm

    Love this. Congrats. Now go buy matching hemp necklaces to celebrate that awesome 90s look in the picture above.

    • Vikki
      April 17, 2013 | 7:55 pm

      How do you know we don’t have them already?

  31. Chrisor
    April 17, 2013 | 2:29 pm

    Happy Anniversary to you & your beloved! I love hearing how couples meet. Wishing you forever & ever amen together. :-)

  32. Sandi
    April 17, 2013 | 2:41 pm

    Lovely, just lovely.

  33. Sandi
    April 17, 2013 | 2:41 pm

    Lovely, just lovely. And the early years pic? Awesome!

  34. Linda
    April 17, 2013 | 3:51 pm

    Aw, congrats to you both and here’s to many more! *waves coffee cup in the air* Cheers!

  35. Dana
    April 17, 2013 | 7:22 pm

    Congratulations! My spouse and I just passed the 20-year mark, too. Clearly, 1993 was a good year!

  36. Vikki
    April 17, 2013 | 7:57 pm

    Thanks for all the good thoughts y’all.

  37. Alison
    April 17, 2013 | 7:58 pm

    Happy 20th Anniversary!

  38. […] job. I have a loving family and fantastic friends. I have a big, full heart. I have mad love for this sweet blog post (and the freaking adorable photos that go with it). I have a new (blue) couch. I have a new […]

  39. Liza
    April 17, 2013 | 8:17 pm

    Congratulations! 20 years is amazing!

  40. Emma
    April 17, 2013 | 9:35 pm

    Aww, that’s lovely. Happy 20 years and here’s to 20 more!

  41. Kaitlyn
    April 18, 2013 | 6:55 am

    So lovely!

  42. Lady Jennie
    April 18, 2013 | 10:11 am

    Love and hugs to you both!

  43. e
    April 18, 2013 | 2:56 pm



    ZOMG — the hat!

  44. AA
    April 18, 2013 | 10:30 pm

    Y’all are so cute, and an inspiration. Congratulations!

  45. LG
    April 20, 2013 | 12:20 pm

    This post made me so happy! Congratulations on both your anniversary AND your impeccable 90s style.

  46. Carla |O|
    April 20, 2013 | 6:07 pm

    Parabéns! :) May there be many more yet to come.

  47. Heather in WA State
    April 20, 2013 | 11:18 pm

    Absolutely beautiful, the two of you. Wishing you every happiness in the next two decades, and beyond!

  48. Marta
    April 22, 2013 | 12:00 pm

    Belatedly, happy anniversary! I think accepting that one of you will make the coffee and the other will write the poem is such an important part of any relationship. You can’t always expect to get what you give in the exact same way. My husband would never write me a poem, but he makes me tea every morning and night.

  49. Galit Breen
    April 22, 2013 | 1:04 pm

    Oh Happy Anniversary, you two! #OwlyApproves #SpecsDoesToo

  50. Anthony
    April 22, 2013 | 9:55 pm

    Love you two…In fact, I love your whole family. Somehow, it works…but I think you have all MADE it work in fabulous style. I have so many memories–of when you first met, of getting to know Luisa, seeing you buy and renovate your house, being there for your ceremony, welcoming your beautiful kids into the world…and so it goes. Yes, somehow it works. I couldn’t be more happy for you.

  51. tracy@sellabitmum
    April 25, 2013 | 2:39 pm

    Aw, Happy Anniversary. I so love this. And you.

  52. Stacy @bklynstacy
    April 25, 2013 | 4:25 pm

    And I die. Really. So thrilled for you both. And both of those photos are pure magic. *sigh*

  53. Jasmine
    May 13, 2013 | 8:22 pm

    love is lovely.

  54. Kristin
    May 16, 2013 | 1:23 pm

    i forgot to say that you look like babies in that photo above!

  55. lesbiannefree
    June 4, 2013 | 6:39 am

    Congratulations! And 20 x 20 more! Love is the answer!
    How beautiful to read of your joy, devotion and true love.

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