Leaving Foreword And Moving Forward

bookmessIn December, as part of one of my last assignments for the Foreword Program at The Loft, I had to complete an overview of my project. I was scared to do it because I already knew that I had not accomplished as much as I had hoped and wanted to avoid concrete disappointment for as long as possible. I procrastinated.

I chose the latest possible deadline to submit my summary.

I blogged and vlogged.

I sat on the couch chewing on ice and reading celebrity gossip.

But, eventually, I had to sit down and write the overview.

I spread out the printed essays drafts on my bedroom floor and pulled up drafts that had not yet been printed on the computer. I cracked open the journal I kept during my 2 years at The Loft and I began to put it all together.

I expected to feel discouraged but was inspired instead. I had written more than I realized and I could actually see my book taking shape. By the end of the process, I had a tentative title and a list of chapters and a clear idea of what still needed to be written. Even though there is still material to be drafted, for the first time, my book felt real.

My time in the Foreword Program ends this week and I will be saying goodbye to my mentor, Cheri Register, who taught me so very much. I will forever be thankful to her for taking me, a humble blogger, and turning me into an essayist. The program will formally end for me on February 15th when I participate in a reading of my work at The Loft.

Now, I move forward on my own and will be actively working to draft the last 6 pieces of this collection. I will have to set my own deadlines which has never been my strong suit but now that I can see where I'm going, I'm hopeful I'll get there.

I mention this partly to explain my recent absence from Up Popped A Fox. When I'm not blogging here, it's safe to assume that I'm working on the book...or drinking espresso. But mostly, working on the book.

I hope to get back in the blogging frame of mind but if there is nothing new here, you can always catch me on Lesbian Family and Aiming Low.

And now...I think it's time for some espresso.